| Premature birth, live or still born is now classified as anything after 20 weeks gestation. This is an extraordinary delineation for the division between miscarriage (or spontaneous abortion) and a baby considered developed enough to live. This has come about due to the latest advances in keeping alive such extremely premature deliveries. Having gradually moved the goal posts and changed the terminology, such an early definition of premature birth has subtly affected the way in which a woman would perceive her loss in this situation. Whereas 20 years ago, anything up to 30 weeks was classified as a miscarriage, nowadays women must adjust to the idea that a half-gestated foetus is considered a potential grown child. Like miscarriage (4 - 20 weeks) and still birth (at full term), a woman who has previously given birth to a premature baby will approach a new pregnancy with mixed feelings. Fresh hope, new commitment, greater understanding, greater acceptance of herself but also possible dread, fear and mistrust in her body that she might repeat the events of the last pregnancy. Any residual anxiety during subsequent pregnancies may in turn affect her state of health and mental composure. Another issue for those now parenting premature babies is how they feel towards the possibility of again having to handle the post-natal period of infant care should a new pregnancy result in yet another premature birth. I have heard parents say that they simply would not risk the heartbreak of going through it all again, no matter how remote. Their fears, therefore, have limited the size of their family. To reapproach pregnancy with the greatest faith and confidence, all likely physical causes of premature birth must be attended to well before a new pregnancy begins. Building real faith in one’s own abilities to give birth to a healthy child is also fundamental, but this faith must be built on the reality of proven transformation not just a superficial positivity arising from the fresh attempt. The normal approach for a woman who has already experienced tragedy during a pregnancy or birth is that she subsequently seeks reassur-ance through the medical model. Having a “good obstetrician” is seen as paramount, and having lots and lots of tests goes without saying. She will want to know, weekly, that “everything is fine”. Whether in fact these tests can detect any good reason for spontaneous labour from 20 weeks on is another matter completely. Whether science could even protect against such things, and whether these assurances are worth anything more than the short term feelings they produce, is also purely academic. As I have said previously, these models of | | care, these ways of relying on external advice for one’s inner capacities to give birth, can frequently end up creating more tension, more unanswered questions and certainly more feelings of helplessness and powerlessness. A more natural and self realised confidence is to properly address all likely issues surrounding conception and pregnancy, by using Yoga Therapy and meditation. |  |  |  | |  | ~Peri-Natal Death (Stillbirth)~ |  | |  |  |  | “Peri” means close to, or around the time of, so this term covers babies who are stillborn, during birth or neo-natal infant deaths. The death of a baby at or around the time of birth must be a heavy burden, and one that requires deep healing and strengthening of body and mind before a new pregnancy is begun. The biggest question is of course, why? Even if medical explanations are forthcoming (and not always are they), there are still the deeper questions of why this child, why me, why us? The hardest legacy is feelings of guilt and responsibility, “If only I had done this or that differently, it might have made a difference”. Yoga Therapy is recommended alongside counselling for resolution of such a situation. During a subsequent pregnancy, positive support is vital particularly as the birth approaches. As explained in previous sections, our bodies hold memories too, and the experience of a new birth has a high chance of bringing up the emotions from any previous one, potentially creating tensions that inhibit easeful birthing. In days gone by, there was a very different attitude to those born with physical or mental disabilities. Some parents felt much shame, and they had those children locked away in institutions. But today, there is a much greater acceptance and integration of such children into the mainstream, and (mostly) their parents find them especially valuable beings to bring up and love. For most women, conceiving, carrying and giving birth to any child, is received as a surprise gift – one which cannot be returned to the shop if you don’t like it, or if it has a “defect”. That is the very first lesson of acceptance a new mother learns – that her child, average or not, is the one she is meant to have.It is usually those who have not experienced the positive attitudes of such parents and such children who have the greatest fears about potential abnormalities. |