The psycho-spiritual movement of shakti is the reverse of the normal physical direction. The yogic and meditative use of shakti is against the normal flow of energy - anti-normal you might say. Every yoga aspirant will testify that to achieve this reversal of flow is very hard. One must work against their own gravity, their laziness, their ignorance. You need the thrust of one hundred rockets to get into orbit!
   As explained above, in women the normal movement of the sex organs and orgasm is upwards, hence when it comes to childbirth and expelling downwards it feels like the reverse of normal. But in psycho-spiritual orgasms (kundalini meditations and tantric sex) the proper direction of movement is downward to consume Shiva's lingam and to give birth to a spiritual baby. This too is very hard for a woman, as it means not being absorbed in herself as with a normal orgasm. It is the same direction as birthing a real baby. Hence for women used only to having incoming sex, internalised orgasms, and not fully expressing their worldly shakti downwards to the earth, labour can be so hard. Therefore the best practices in preparation for childbirthing is lots of grounding work and love making conducted, of course, according to the principles of tantric union!
   Because the male sexual organs are external, by nature ejaculation must be external. In orgasms, he gives out his power, his essence. Usually, the male orgasmic experience travels from the perineum (Mooladhara chakra) only as far as the penis (Swadhisthana chakra) at which point the energy is dissipated. Moments later an energy depression hits - often they roll over and go to sleep! A man loses a great amount of energy through external ejaculation. Many religious and spiritual writings have commented on it being desirable to avoid this unless the purpose of the sex is for reproduction. Obviously for the purposes of conception, the male's seed must be diverted out the penis but the intention of the tantric male orgasm is to maintain that energy within the system, raising it up inside the spinal column to higher chakras and sharing it, merging that experience with the woman's internal orgasm.
   In tantric lovemaking the male is able to achieve non-ejaculatory, non reproductive orgasm. Through perfecting certain muscular and mental exercises, he learns to hold the energy of orgasm and thereby his seed inside himself, much more like the woman's normal experience. For the man this is experienced as a whole body 

orgasm. If, through disciplined meditative teamwork, the woman and man achieve simultaneous (internally held) orgasm, then a very powerful shared awakening of energy and consciousness is experienced.
   The normal direction of shiva / consciousness is upwards. Consciousness is a very volatile element, always tending to rarefy itself, separating from gross matter. The meditative reversal of this is to bring the consciousness down, to make it more manifest within the world rather than to let it just drift off into heaven. It is far more useful to enlighten ignorant energy than to leave it to evolve unassisted, and therefore the primary role of Shiva has always been that of the teacher or proto-guru.
   This area of psycho-spiritual sex is a fascinating topic and one worthy of a whole book in itself, of which there are many. Here I am just outlining a few basic principles which can enhance the conception experience and assist you and your partner to spiritualise your sexual relationship. But be warned, reversing the flow of your elemental nature can certainly be a topsy turvy affair. Tantra is powerful stuff and can shake things up in other areas of your life as well!

	~The Three Purposes of Sex~

   According to the traditions of tantra, our sexual organs can be used for 3 different purposes. In order of their obvious popularity they are: pleasure, procreation and self transcendence. I often wonder what percentages of sex the world over is performed for these above 3 reasons. I don't think anyone could ever know, but such a statistic would tell us much about the human sexual condition. Let us explore each of these motivations physically and psychologically.
   The use of sex for pleasure would definitely be the most popular use in the world today! When sex is engaged solely for the purpose of pleasure, as we all know, that pleasure is fairly short lived and usually only satisfies at a relatively superficial level. This pleasure can be of 3 types: physical, emotional, intellectual. Even without orgasmic culmination, men and women can both derive a lot of pleasure from the process. Over the years, there has been much unnecessary anxiety caused by the expectation that sex should always lead to orgasm but people are now wising up to the problems caused by this attitude. However, since orgasm is a possibility, the inability to