obtain it, or obtain satisfaction from it,may be seen as an indicator that all is not functioning well in the faculties which produce that pleasure mechanism. I do not mean to induce any shame or guilt in those unable to have satisfying orgasms, but rather to give hope and assistance for changing the situation. If the focus of sexual activity is not solely orgasm, and at other times efforts are made to improve one's reproductive and psychological health, then all will be well in the long run. The reasons for inability to attain orgasm are many and complex, and there are many therapeutic ways in which this can be rectified, including yogic practices. See the Prescriptive Yoga Program - "2017. In conjunction with remedying any blockages of sexual energy with the above-mentioned program, one should also begin the regular practice of Yoga Nidra to help unlock any unconscious fears surrounding sex and any sexual relationships, be they past and present.
For a woman, historical sexual problems or those within a present relationship can greatly affect the outcomes of conception, pregnancy and childbirth, so it is of great advantage to resolve the causes of sexual unfulfillment well prior to becoming pregnant. Reproductive health is closely related to healthy sexual function and all of the therapeutic yoga practices for the pelvic area can help in this regard. For the most appropriate recommendations to suit your situation, see the Prescriptive Programs in Chapter 9.
For many people, it can be the emotional pleasure which is lacking in their sex life. This is where the difference between "having sex" and "making love" can be identified. A disparity of intention and fulfilment between partners in this area is a sore point for many. Such people can seek counselling or will find many of yoga's self awareness tools of great use in improving this level of their relationship. But of course he has to want to do it as well!
Sexual thoughts and activity, whether there be an abundance or shortage of them, have a strong effect on the mind. Health of the mind is very much dependent on the interplay between needs and desires being fulfilled, and I believe the lack of sexual satisfaction in society today is a frequent source of mental imbalance. How can one enhance the mental pleasure enjoyed in sex / love making? Well, firstly by the process of communi-cation. Talk about what is wanted by each partner and how to achieve it. Sometimes spontaneously verbalising thoughts and feelings during sex is a good way to "link" on the mental level. Eventually a silent conversation will be occurring and that leads to an intuitive
sexual flow as well as greater mental satisfaction in the rest of the day too.
The second most popular use of the genitals in the world today would be for the purpose of reproduction - both intentional and accidental. The physical and psychological factors allowing successful reproduction (and prevention of it) in a woman are much more complex than those needed simply for pleasure. The female reproductive system is enormously intricate in structure and function. There are so many woman today having trouble with infertility, and increasingly so. This can be due to a wide variety and combination of factors such as inherited conditions, environmental causes, general stress, post-traumatic stress, diet, as well as the not so obvious mental and emotional factors. For those women who are experiencing difficulties in becoming pregnant, short of resorting to the expensive medical options, I hope this book can offer practical ways of remedying reproductive ailments. Many of these areas are addressed in the coming chapters.
Assuming that one does have a functioning reproductive system, sex with the purpose of bringing another child into the world is a deeply meaningful act. Most people would consider that, a man and a woman, joining bodies, hearts and minds in love, would be the highest reason for engaging in sex. A child conceived under those conditions would have had the best start to life. On the other hand, we would all agree that a child unintentionally conceived during an act of loveless sex, within a relationship of mutual resentment has, unfortunately, not had the best start. A certain psychic patterning will be built in to that baby, which may or may not be realised or resolved within its life. Such a child is a total victim of its parents' un-togetherness and will usually go through its own life replicating that conflict. I believe that it is up to every one of us, all women and men, to do our utmost to produce progeny of only the highest possible calibre in every way we can, and this starts with the intentions of our sex life and our love making.
In tantra there exists one more reason for sex and love making which, whilst not demeaning the previous two, goes beyond them to experiences often only dreamed of. This third usage of the genitals involves the conscious spiritual relationship that a female and male can have through the union of all their forces, both physical and metaphysical. Such sex, performed as meditation or divine worship, requires the greatest of physical and psychological fitness, balance and integration. Without proper function at